"Hey Mommy! Look! I have all the supplies I need...paper, scissors, tape, ruler, and a lightsaber!"


"This lollipop tastes like Mommy kisses...or maybe shampoo."


"Mommy, will you scratch my back? Down. Left. Left. Right. Up. Left. Left. Down. Right. Up. Up. Up. Right. Left. Ok. Now you can scratch anywhere on my back. You know, wherever you want to."


"Our house? Is it in the middle of the street?"

MrP: OW!
Mommy: What's the matter, little guy?
MrP: I slipped and bonked my buttock.
Mommy: Ah. I'm sorry about your buttocks.
MrP: No, mommy, I only bonked ONE buttock.
Mommy: My mistake.
MrP: You can make it better by kissing my buttock.

Some people go to birthday parties and come home with a goodie bag. We come home with a robot. Here is R2D2 welcoming his new friend. They currently live by our front door as MrP has declared that, "every house needs guard droids."

"I would like a Lego Ninjago and a Yoga Mat"

MrP: Mommy, I get to be the flag kid at school this week!
Mommy: Cool! What does the flag kid do?
MrP: Flag kids get to carry the flag. Then we look at the flag and say the pledge.
Mommy: That's great! Does it go like..."I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands..."
MrP: NO! Mommy, there are no witches in the pledge!


Daddy: Maybe we should watch The Princess Bride tonight.
MrP: Is it Star Wars?
Daddy: No. It's called The Princess Bride.
MrP: Is it Star Wars?
Daddy: It's all about rescuing a princess except they have swords instead of blasters and they ride horses instead of spaceships and it doesn't take place in space.
MrP: So it's like Star Wars?
Daddy: Sure.


"This little piggy went to yoga. This little piggy stayed home. This little piggy had rice and nori. This little piggy had none. And this little piggy cried 'cookie cookie cookie' all the way to Fresh Market."


Mommy: Whatcha eatin'?
MrP: Strawberries and Nori.
Mommy: Together?
MrP: Yup. Strawberries wrapped in nori are the best!
Mommy: I would not have guessed that.
MrP: Strawberries in nori are even better when you dip them in Nutella.
Mommy: Alrighty then.


"Hi! My name is Darth P. It's nice to meet you. Now stand still and let me cut your hand off!"

Grammy,
Get better soon. Get sleep and lay down. If you feel sick you should eat broccoli. Maybe I could come over and play and help make you feel better.
♥ Parker

"Mommy, do I look like a Stormtrooper? See. A Stormtrooper always holds his blaster in this hand...or this hand. See how I'm holding my blaster? Don't I look like a Stormtrooper?"

"Mommy, stay on target...stay on target..."

Mommy: g'morning, R2!
MrP: His name isn't R2, Mommy.
Mommy: Really? What's his name?
MrP: His name is RToot-DToot!
Mommy: And why is that?
MrP: Because I tooted when I was wearing him.
Mommy: Ahhhhhhh...lovely.
MrP: My toot sounded like, "beep boop boop plbthhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"


"Mommy, I have to go to yoga today. I need to go to yoga with my friend Luke. Yoga is today, Mommy. Is it time for yoga yet? Mommy, get a move on, it's time for you to TAKE ME TO YOGAAAAAAAAAAAA"


MrP: Guess what!? There are 100 cars in this world!
Mommy: I think there might be a few more than that.
MrP: 1659?
Mommy: Maybe a couple more than that.
MrP: 1702?
Mommy: Even more...
MrP: WOW!


MrP: Mommy, I'm keeping my money extra safe!
Mommy: How are you going to do that?
MrP: Ducky tape on my wallet.
Mommy: Good thinking.
15 minutes later...
MrP: Mommy, do you know where my wallet is?
Mommy: I don't know, kid. I thought you were working on keeping it extra safe with some duct tape.
MrP: Mommy! Number one, it's ducky tape. Number Two, I can't find it.
Mommy: Sounds like your money is extra safe. If you can't find it then you can't spend the money.
MrP: Mommmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeee!


MrP: Mommy, I'm cheesy!
Mommy: Yes, kid, sometimes you are a little goofy.
MrP: No, Mommy, I have lots of cheese in my toes. I need a bath.
Mommy: Oh. Yes. There's that too.


MrP: Mommy, to be the Roger-Roger guys in Star Wars you need cheat codes. I'm not kidding!
Daddy: Actually, MrP, there aren't any cheat codes for Star Wars. To unlock those guys you need to beat all the levels.
MrP: Oh. Well. Daddy, I think I might need to play some XBox.
Mommy & Daddy: Hmmmmmmmmm...


"Mommy, do you know what hot and hot make? Hottest! *tee hee hee hee* Mommy, do you know what big and big make? Huge! *tee hee hee hee*"


"Mommy, when we get home I am going to play super heroes with imaginary Scooby and imaginary Shaggy."

MrP (trying to stifle some tears): Mommy, I don't want to grow up and drive a car. I want to be your little boy forever!
Mommy: Oh, sweetheart! You will ALWAYS be my little boy! You will be my little baby boy even when you are old enough to drive a car.
MrP: Ok. Don't worry, mommy, my eyes are wet because I'm tired, not because I'm scared.
Mommy (now mommy is trying to stifle some tears): Are you nervous about T-K today?
MrP: No. I'm not nervous about school. I'm nervous because I don't know all the kids.
Mommy: It's ok, honey. Mommy is a grown up and even I get nervous when I don't know people. Don't worry, though, I'm sure that you'll get to know everyone in your class soon.
MrP: On the playground?
Mommy: In the classroom and on the playground. And don't forget that you'll see your friends from other classes on the playground.
MrP: Mommy, do you know that MrA has a monster truck and it's just like mine, but bigger? Here. Look at my monster truck. Can we go to school now? I want to play monster trucks with MrA!
Mommy: Sooooooo...we're all better now? It's ok if you're a little nervous.
MrP: I'm gonna play monster trucks. I'm not gonna play nervous.


"Mommy, tell Daddy that I want those things with nori that is made out of rice and you put the vegetables in it and roll it up and eat it. You now what I mean. I want rice paper rolls for dinner. Tell Daddy. Tell him. Tell him right now, Mommy!"


MrP: Mommy, I have to go number three!
Mommy: Er...number three!?
MrP: Yeah. I have to go number one AND number two. That means I'm gonna go number three because one and two is three. I can add AND I can pee and poop!
Mommy: Alrighty then.

It's consignment sale time again. Mommy found a turtle costume to add to MrP's dress up box. She only shelled out (pun totally intended) two bucks for this fabulous find.